In two days I will be leading my first day-long art journaling workshop Soulidarity. I have been working really hard getting it all prepared and I think the content is great and it’s going to be a wonderful day.
But that doesn’t stop the nerves. And the fear. And the insecurity.
I think putting yourself out there a bit and trying something new is never easy. There are a lot of unknown factors. What if it doesn’t go well? What if no one likes it? What if I sweat and stumble over my words?
These are all valid fears, I know this. But being an artist, I have had to put myself out there on so many occasions. Anytime I hang work on a gallery wall or even post a new painting on Facebook, I am putting myself out there. It never really gets easier but I think I’ve gotten more used to the feeling.
I remember my first solo show ever, the art was hung on the gallery walls the night before and it looked great. I felt so happy with it and so proud. My husband took me out to dinner to celebrate. We ordered wine and pasta and in the middle of a forkful of ravioli, I broke down and cried, “I can’t do it!”. I knew it was irrational, of course I could do it. It was done. All I had to do was show up. But the fear still gripped me, I couldn’t sleep that night.
That solo show turned out to be one of my best shows ever. I still remember it as one of my most fulfilling and successful days.
I’ve come to the conclusion that if you’re not feeling a little fear in your life, then you’re not really challenging yourself. It’s not easy to go out on a limb but the rewards are phenomenal. That’s how all great things start, with a first step and facing a little bit of fear.
This morning as my husband left for work I said, “I’m getting a little nervous about my workshop.” He smiled and said simply, “That’s how you know it’s gonna be great!”
Can’t wait to see all you people on Saturday. Thanks for taking the leap with me.